Story telling from Australia
The damage was slight, just a small dent in the car. And the culprit? A seedpod.
It wasn’t just any old seedpod. This was a nine-inch whopper weighing in at a fraction under a pound, or twenty-four centimetres and three hundred and fifty grams – massive whichever way you look at it. The pod contained five milk-white globes, tucked up together like smooth chestnuts. Only bigger.
A quick look up confirmed the pod had dropped from a tree at the front of house. I have no idea what species of tree it is, but a few months ago it carried a display of bright orange flowers that attracted nectar-loving rainbow lorikeets by the dozen. Now it contains a large number of seedpods, waiting to fall on unsuspecting passers-by.
I worried that visitors might be felled before they reached the front door and thought about putting up a sign. I told friends to watch out if they were planning to call. Inga rang the doorbell carrying an open umbrella. Needless to say, it wasn’t raining.
When a journalist arranged to visit for an interview about Love in the Outback I sent a text message, warning her that giant seedpods could fall from the sky as she approached the front door.
She arrived without mishap, seemingly unconcerned about the looming threat, and when she left I jokingly said, ‘Mind they don’t get you on the way out.’
She looked at me blankly. ‘The text message about giant seedpods,’ I reminded her.
‘What text message?’
It turns out I got the number wrong. I sent the warning to a random stranger, who even now might be wandering around Sydney worried that a giant seedpod is about to fall on his (or her) head.
It would be poetic justice if that person worked for Monsanto, but life rarely works out in such a neatly satisfying way. It will probably hit me. Or Clyde. Of course, there’s always the possibility that one of those giant seedpods could hit someone visiting the house.
Hopefully this blog will indemnify me. Or incriminate me.
Maybe I need a lawyer?
Either way, watch out if you’re planning to visit us any day soon.
PS Does anyone know what this tree is?